“Stupid sh*t trump says”
Christmas is over, (most of) the chocolates have been consumed, everyone has started their new year’s resolutions and for many Uni students the grey cloud of upcoming January exams is looming over their heads. Revision over the Christmas period sucks but hopefully this is an article you can relate to and know you’re not alone!
1. “Why oh WHYYYY didn’t I listen to/pay attention in/attend my lectures for the first four weeks of Uni?” Those extra couple of hours in bed don’t seem so sweet now, do they?
2. “Okay… I think I might actually be understanding this.” TFW you read something and actually take it in and you think you may in fact be a God.
3. “I can’t believe how easy this is! I am a genius and I am going to SMASH this exam!” Ah, the overconfident stage. Hold onto this feeling for as long as possible.
4. “This is definitely NOT easy, I am NOT a genius and oh god this exam will be the death of me.” The realisation that everything you’ve learnt so far now makes no sense and you’re back to square one. This is also known as the heart shattering stage.
5. “Which bits of this module can I leave out and still ensure a pass?” Desperate times call for desperate measures. Although it can be risky, leaving out parts of a module becomes an essential revision strategy in order to fit in all the important things.
6. “I NEED retail therapy.” A necessity. A potentially very expensive one, but a necessity nonetheless. They might say money can’t buy you happiness but it sure can relieve some revision stress when spent on a new skirt or some chicken nuggets.
7. “If I book flights now, I could be sunning myself in Tenerife in 48 hours instead of sitting in a freezing cold exam room crying myself into oblivion.” The alternatives stage, i.e. dreaming up scenarios in your head that would be better than taking your exam. Spoiler: most things are better than taking exams.
8. “Can’t. Sleep. Must. Revise.” The stage where any break including sleeping and eating seems like a bad idea because you’re not absorbing information.
9. “One more day and I’ll be free of this nightmare and I can binge watch Orange Is The New Black like there’s no tomorrow.” The end is in sight and all those important plans for the future can be made to help you over that last hurdle.
10. “Here goes… we got this!” Going into the exam hall with a positive attitude is always the best way to go. Even if you’re not 100% ready, fool yourself into thinking you are and you’ll give it so much more than you might otherwise.
However you feel about your upcoming exams, my advice as a former student would be to stay calm, look after yourself and set yourself realistic goals. Good luck all, and now you’ve read this article you can stop procrastinating.
Written by Charli Babb, 11 months ago
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