Since when exactly did Tinder turn into a free and easier version of Ashley Madison? If you aren’t familiar with the site, it’s one and only purpose is to help and encourage affairs.

So answer me this: have I been asleep for the past few years? Did I miss the mass email about the change of Tinder while I was content in my previous relationship? Why has Tinder suddenly become the go-to for cheaters?

It’s not on.

It’s hard enough trying to meet new people these days. I mean, it’s hard enough to even get out of bed, attempting to work, and still maintaining a social life, never mind anything else. Tinder was once the holy grail of dating. It made it quick, easy, and fun to meet and hook up with similar people in your area.

Now? Well, now it just seems like every guy and his grandfather is swiping right while they wait for the bus looking for some “model” to follow on Instagram and any girl to “send nudes” to while their girlfriends are working the night shift.

I never used to hate on Tinder. I mean, I met my ex on there (okay, maybe I should hate on it then) but for someone who’s a little shy now and again, it allows me the confidence to meet guys I would normally be too shy to talk to.

“ Why has Tinder suddenly become the go-to for cheaters? ”

Lately, as I’m dipping back into the single whirlpool, it seems not only do I have to check these guys are real, the age they claim to be, or whether they’re a mass murderer or a pervert, but I’ve also got to make sure they aren’t happily living with an innocent fiancé with good hair and their two cats.

It’s stressful.

I’d been taking to Sam for a few months. He was sweet, a little awkward and liked sending ridiculous Snapchats. He liked to phone me when he was bored and we actually ended up talking almost every day. He seemed almost too good to be true.

Enter one strange and unusual message on my Facebook requests one Sunday evening.

From Sam’s fiancé. 

“ They just don't want you to see their other life ”

Que the stomach drop moment and the flood of guilt as I scrolled through picture after picture of a timeline of their “happy” relationship. I’m talking Christmas with the folks, holidays to Spain, game nights with other couple friends, and the cats; let’s not forget how much they loved their cats.

Jane reached out to me after she discovered her boyfriend’s second Snapchat account. Yes, he had two accounts: one for his private life and one for his Tinder girls. As I was his number one friend (lucky me), she messaged me first and the truth came flooding out.

I couldn’t believe it. I was in shock and complete and utter disbelief that someone could be so creative in their attempt to cheat. Together, we synced dates and realised that days I’d see him had been when she was out of town and FaceTime evenings were while she was at work. 

Sadly, it all made complete and utter sense. I was left with this empty feeling of guilt for something that wasn’t my fault and so much anger at someone that they could be so deceitful. Not only to this apparently lovely girl but to me and God knows who else.

Maybe the internet and social media have made it far too easy to create more than one profile. Just because you think you can cheat and get away with it, it doesn’t mean you should and, honestly, you’re going to get caught out eventually. Regardless of your opinions of Tinder, don’t log on if you’ve got someone at home. It’s a dick move. 

Make sure you check out the girl or guy you’re meeting on Facebook before you agree to meet them. I’m no longer buying the “I don’t use Instagram or Facebook” excuse because if they’ve got Tinder, I’m sure they use Facebook or Instagram. They do use it, they just don’t want you to see their other life. 

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Written by Jordan Taylor, 9 months ago
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